About Me

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I am a SAHM of 3 and a wife of one. I started a blog to just bitch about life and now our youngest son is very sick I want to hear from other families going thru this and support eachother. He has SBS secondary to NEC with only 50 cm proximal jejunum and a 3 cm segment of terminal ileum. He is TPN dependent. He is a tough little 6 lb, 3 month old! Keeping my mind from turning to mush, Scentsy was introduced to me and I'm very thankful. The wonderful people in this community has changed my life. Even so, chaos in our house is a daily adventure. Some days, alright most days.. I take things minute by minute. To get through this bumpy road called 'life' I need my husband Jerad and my kids, my son Jordan 15, and my daughter Jaycee who is 11, and my son Jaxon is 3 months...I say it how it is... So I will say this.... "If you don't like what you are reading, you have the choice to leave my page. Nice, bitchy, raging lunitic, loving.. that's me! I admit I swear like a sailor, I may have different religious beliefs, I hate brussel sprouts with a passion.. these are all ways to describe ME.. I love making new friends but I will not 'pretend' to be someone I'm not just for their sake.

Sunday, October 10, 2010

Good times old friend

      Friday was a great day.  I started out going to get my nails done, an hour of adult time is always good.  Then went and got a piercing I always wanted.  Laughing, smiling and just having a good time was what I needed before I went and had my treatment.  I was not looking forward to being sick and throwing up the rest of the weekend.  Jaycee having been sick all week with her kidney infection was a tad bit wearing.  On the way home I received a phone call to tell me with all the medication they were giving her, it was basically pissing off her liver.  If I haven't mentioned before, both my kids have a terminal liver disease and they are only to take medication of any kind only if it is necessary.  So at this point I'm losing my 'high' I've been feeling of my day starting off so great.  I finally got home and I sat down in my comfy recliner chair as my kids told me to go to bed and rest.  Before I took their advice I checked my phone messages.  I always turn off my phone while I'm at the hospital and had forgotten to turn it back on.  When I did there were 5 messages.  As I thought maybe it was Jerad being anxious to call and tell me he loves me as he often does from work. The first message was a customer calling to place a Scentsy order.  Maybe it'll end as a good day after all.  The next 3 messages were telling me that a great friend and a wonderful person had died a few hours prior.  I was devastated.  My kids excited asking, "Was that dad calling, is he on his way home?"  Sitting there not knowing how to react in front of the kids, beings they know this amazing person as well.   I calmly said, "Dad will be home soon, I'm going up to bed now". I tried to watch T.V. and couldn't.  I heard rain tapping at my window.  Rain is one of my favorite things in the world.  I lay there in the dark, pulled up the blinds, watching the rain and counting between the lightening strikes.  I cried and cried remembering the good times we had, from being the go to guy for every computer question and him knowing in my voice I was calling about this piece of shit square box that I hate with a passion when it doesn't cooperate.  Going camping many times, getting stuck in a rain storm... everyone covered in mud, running to get covers over their belongings, sitting in tents and cars, looking at each other from the windows.  Sitting around the campfire listening to good ole' country music, drinkin' a bit, smokin' a bit, you catching me and pulling me out of the fire as I fell in.  Good times old friend, knowing you for 16 years I can't believe your gone.  Always on my mind, forever in my heart.

     The last message I listened to was Jerad calling to tell me he was running late at work but he would be home soon and he loved me........


  1. my condolences; I hope you and your family comfort each other threw this; as love is the best medicine.

  2. I'm so sorry :( Its never easy

    following you from BM

  3. I'm so sorry!! I have never lost anyone that close to me, so I can't say I know how you feel, but hang in there!

    Heather From and Mommy Only Has Two Hands! and Lynhea Designs

  4. Thank you for the nice comments. I still cannot believe he is gone and I just can't pick up the phone and call him. It's a hard thing to understand.... Take care everyone!